Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Relationship Lessons

Check out my Guest Spotlight Post for Simply Solo, going up today! 
And, in the spirit of single life and dating, here's a lesson plan on what my past relationships have taught me. May I review it often and never make the same mistakes again. (Or, if I must, may they be delicious, exciting, and passionate mistakes).


The Good High-School Boyfriend

·      Losing one’s virginity to a boyfriend is better than losing it to some random guy at a party, I’m guessing, because it’s forgettable. The latter would have been more memorable, in a bad way.
·      Cheating doesn’t change the fact that you’re still in a bad relationship.
·      Getting to say, “I have a boyfriend,” is not a good enough reason to be with someone.


The Bad College Boyfriend

·      Losing weight and working out like a maniac will not stop a man from looking at other women.
·      Open relationships are bullshit.
·      If he doesn’t say, “I love you,” he probably doesn’t love me.


The Feminist Guy (one of my favorites)

·      A woman does not have to be tamed, waxed, manicured, plucked, smooth, soft, undernourished, or even feminine, if that’s not who she is.
·      There’s no such thing as “good enough to marry”. Everyone is good enough to marry.
·      The female orgasm is VERY IMPORTANT. 


The Richard Burton to my inner Elizabeth Taylor 

·      Passion makes everything amazing, and also very dramatic.
·      Fantastic sex does not mean you’re madly in love and should get married.
·      When a man says, “I’m not looking for a committed relationship,” it means he’s not looking for a committed relationship. Not now, and not when he gets to know you better and has so much sex with you that the obvious next-step would be to want to be in a committed relationship with you.


The Forbidden Love

·      Everything feels amazing when it's forbidden, but that doesn't change the fact that it's forbidden.
·      It’s easy for guys to say, “I love you, you’re my soul mate, I can’t live without you,” when they’re in an impossible situation that has a definite end-point in sight.
·      I’m not all good. It’s important to know that.


The Serious Boyfriend

·      If I don’t trust a guy, there’s probably good reason for it. No need to stick around and investigate what the reasons are, just get out.
·      If I’m not happy, I better speak up, and soon.
·      Never give up passion. That is a compromise that will come back to bite me in the butt.  


Conclusion: If it didn't work out, learn from it, grow, and know that I will never know everything there is to know about relationships and how to make them work. There's always more to learn, and so there are always more love stories to come. At least until I find the guy I want to keep making mistakes with and learning from for the rest of my life...

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