Keep your woman in line, Gap

Viv Viv Viv:

I didn't mean to insult your books.  I am sure they are entertaining reading for young women and housewives who want their stories a little darker than 50 Shades.  But based on my "understanding of the books" (read: no real basis) they are basically Twilight meets Gone With the Wind.  Maybe better writing than Twilight but the point is they all southern and romancy and not what sweet dudes like Gap, Brought, or I would have any interest in.  So while the show has its flaws, huge flaws at that, if they simply followed the books, men would have no interest in the show in the first place.

Now to your points:

Sookie is so goddamn annoying.  She is the worst character other than Tara.  Her sweet innocent naive girl shtick is the WORST.  I would much prefer seeing random minor characters like Eric's sister getting banged because at least she doesn't make me want to claw my face off every time she talks.  We want moar Eric's ass, less Sookie's bosoms!  That's a fact!

My understanding of the books is that Russell is a completely different character.  That he is basically a slimy politician who runs as the first vampire candidate for President. Russell in the show is awesome as a funny, charming ultra powerful evil megalomaniac.  Show Russell is awesome and I refuse to accept any alternate version of him.  GTFO Felipe de Castro!  Go back to Cuba!

 So the fairies were in the books.  Another reason for me to not read the books.

Werepanthers are so fucking stupid.  This story started to lose its way when it stopped focusing on the frictions caused in society when vampires come out and reveal their existence to humans and started focusing on the apparently dozens of other supernatural species out there.  And apparently not happy with the variety of supernatural beings that already exist in fiction, they decided to create new ones.  Like werepanthers.  I hope the books (and the show) come up with some great new supernatural beings.  Like wereaardvarks.  And werechinchillas.  Andwereants.

Fuck Elvis.  Vampire Hendrix or GTFO. 


No, the only HBO show that needs to follow the books more closely is Game of Thrones.

/puts on hipster glasses and gives Gap a knowing look, then turns and eyes Viv and Brought smugly