This Hits A Little Too Close To Home

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

A homecoming

It's been years since I've used XBMC as my media center. I have a shitload of movies, TV shows, music, and pictures on my HTPC, and I'm always looking for a nice interface to deliver them to me. For a long time now I've been using Boxee's PC software. The latest (and final release) was something of a disappointment. The apps were terrible and so was the navigation and library integration. I decided to look around for another solution.

Unfortunately, I listened to stupid Tommy Jarvis and bought an Apple TV. There's nothing wrong with the product, but there's not a lot right with it either. Perhaps if the jailbreak for the Apple TV 3 was available, I'd be singing a different tune. It's not, so I'm not.

Tommy used a streaming app that allowed him to stream video from his PC to the Apple TV via his iPad or iPhone. It's a terrible idea for anyone that has HD content and surround sound. The image is compressed and all surround sound decoding is dropped. You're left with a shitty image and mono audio. Go fuck yourself.

XBMC had recently released their latest version, dubbed "Eden". I decided to give it a try. Holy fuck, is it lovely. Now, this setup is not for the novice HTPC user, just ask Viv. I've spent at least 4 hours getting everything setup, and I'm not completely finished. The end result is more than worth it. The guys at XBMC have outdone themselves with this release. Once your media is added to the interface and properly tagged (you can get as granular as you like), you're golden.

You access your movie library and the UI is just heaven. You have numerous views (cover art, scrolling, description, etc.) and numerous filters. You can have it show you all the movies in your collection by director, actors, genre, rating, etc. It's fucking ridiculous. Same thing with music. All of my albums have everything from band bios to cover/jacket art.

I cannot begin to go into detail with the options they've given you, let's just say it's everything imaginable. You can configure audio, video, and network access down to the finest detail. Yeah, they've added remote access now too.

The apps are another thing that pulled me in. Basically, you have video, audio, and program apps that you pull from a repository and add to your XBMC. Everything from live TV streaming, podcasts, web browsers, facebook, and disaster recovery. It's unreal. I've loaded tons of apps, but I have yet to go through them all.

To top it all off, they've created two magnificent remotes for the iPad and iPhone. The iPad app is stunning. I prefer the one that wasn't created by team XBMC. Constellation is just a work of art (the iPad app). You literally have full control of your XBMC from it. I prefer the team XBMC app for the iPhone though, it's sleeker and less busy.

The total cost for all this wonderful shit: $0.00. Unbeatable.

Zombies Schmombies

I have been laughing, as I picture Gap sitting in front of his computer, in an alcohol-fueled paranoid rage, as he reads story after story on the Internet foretelling the coming zombie apocalypse.  But to that I say... "meh."  Zombies aren't really a threat.  Sure, they will probably kill a lot of us but at the end of the day, they can't end humanity.  Our military would destroy zombies.  Zombies could never overtake our military, or really any military, it is simply impossible.  Let's assume that these are your standard zombies that must bite their victims to spread their zombie-ness.  Because if the disease is airborne then all bets are off.  But an airborne disease that causes zombies would be no worse than an airborne super flu or super-contagious Ebola.  Both would wipe out the human population, and quite frankly, I would much prefer a disease that makes me commit violent acts and cannibalism over one that just liquifies my organs until I vomit out my own intestines and suffer miserably until the feverish hallucinations make the pain go away.  Eating brains sounds way better then that disease from Outbreak.  So if we assume zombies need to bite, our military would destroy them.  They could mow them down with machine guns, they wouldn't  even have to use our even more vastly superior military technology.  Because zombies are dumb and they can't coordinate or strategize in a sophisticated way and they don't use weapons.  Need a reminder to what a military can do do an angry horde?  Ask Syria.  Think of what our military did to the Iraqi Republican Guard, and those were highly trained soldiers with tanks and significant fire power.  Zombies are ruhtards who just run blindly at their prey, oblivious to everything.  Hell, just put some cow carcasses behind a heavily electrified fence and you basically just created a giant zombie bug zapper.  Or just do the same thing and draw them into an open area and bomb the shit out of them.  Zombies are writing checks that their brains can't cash.  We will beat back the zombie hordes.  So yeah the zombies will still kill those of us who aren't lucky enough to be protected by the military but as they rip me limb from limb, I will just laugh smugly, knowing that their comeuppance is coming.  But it doesn't matter because we have a much bigger problem.  What's that you ask?



I am really getting sick and tired of these goddamn scientists pushing the ethical bounds and creating more and more advanced killer robots.  WOULD YOU FUCKING STOP IT!  YOU SCIENTISTS ARE ALL NERDS SO I KNOW YOU HAVE SEEN ALL THE SCIENCE FICTION DEPICTING WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HUMANITY'S HUBRIS CREATES ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE!  So what are these goddamn scientists doing now?  They have created a robot that is capable of building its own tools to accomplish its tasks.  I FEEL LIKE I AM TAKING CRAZY PILLS!  Fucking robots that can create tools!?!   Today it is "rudimentary cups to transport water."  Tomorrow it will be "laser guns to destroy our human masters."  Jesus Christ, everyone knows that creating and using tools is the milestone for dominance of the planet.  A few hundred thousand years ago, fucking saber-tooth tigers were at the top of the food chain and they absolutely loved eating apes.  Then the apes learned how to make tools and started calling themselves humans and saber tooth tigers are extinct, along with a million other species that got in the way of our expansion plans.  So way to go scientists teach the cold, calculating robots how to make tools.  I'll be over here trying to appease our soon to be new robot masters by writing a erotic robot apocalypse  skit.