So, a while ago I found out that the active ingredient in anti-freeze is ethylene glycol. It's the stuff that kills you up real good if you drink it. Now, it has a sweet taste and is essentially undetected in most standard autopsy reports. Basically, it'll just look like you died of an enlarged heart. It's the perfect killer. I made up my mind to poison bilbo's Fanta with it. I sneaked into his new house while he and the Mrs. were sound asleep. I threw open the refrigerator door and saw two cans left. I filled up my hypodermic needle and began to inject it into the top of the can. After I was finished, I concealed the puncture on the can and decided to have a look around the house. Turns out he had some corned beef and ham. I was really hungry so I made a sandwich. Not thinking I pulled out a fanta and drank it with my sandwich. To make a long story short: I need a fucking kidney transplant NOW! -Gap
"Years ago I found that ethylene glycol was a silent, untraceable killer. Knowing my enemies list was growing, I slowly began to build up a tolerance to this deadly chemical. Now I can drink anti-freeze by the tumbler. It has a horrible bite when served neat, but smooths nicely when cut with ice. Now I drink it all the time, even mixing it with my sweet Orange Fanta or green tea. I don't even think about the fact that it's deadly to others anymore and do things like marinate steak with it or use it as a tasty base for my barbeque sauce. Neighbors call me Jim Jones because all of my gatherings end with me standing in the middle of 10-12 dead bodies. I went through 12 Mrs. Bilbos before remembering not to serve it to them. Boy am I parched and sober, better run down to the gas station and buy some more good juice!" -Brought
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