Chris Pine, you lucky sum'bitch!

You are dating the finest artist of our generation! For years, I have thoroughly dominated MS Paint format, but my hat goes off to Olivia, the new leader in MS Paint Art.* Who apparently is being thoroughly dominated by Chris Pine. Who apparently is the dude who played William Shatner in the new Star Trek movie.

* /cocks shotgun and waits for Tommy or Eugene to show up




Slight plot hole. In Chapter one, you requested Chris Pine to place his penis in your mouth and throat area but then later in the story you suggest the penis should be in your vagina (or possibly your wrist or possibly that surfboard) "all the time." It can't be both places at once, Olivia! Unless the normal rules don't apply to Chris Pine. Is Chris Pine "special" like certain characters in Lost??? Is he the Desmond or Walt of dudes who are fucking Olivia!?! Oh wow, the plot just thickened! Consider me captivated by the awesome plot twists in this epic drama!



What's Choice B? WHAT IS CHOICE B!?!?!?! CLIFFHANGER!!!!!



Um....

/loosens collar

Oh boy! I uhhh...

/starts sweating

You see, here we have... Geez Louise

(head explodes)

The Aphra Behn of MS Paint

Former Hutt slave girl, Olivia Munn, will certainly go down as one of the greatest actresses of our generation. Her stunning performance in __________ [note: research and insert movie] where she portrayed _______________ [note: research and insert role], will go down as one of the greatest onscreen performances of all time.


But after some nerds hacked into her Twitter and stole some private pictures, it is now revealed she is also quite the wordsmith. Olivia is not simply building on the body of achievement of __________ [note: research and insert ethnicity] writers. Instead she has created an entirely new form of prose, that of MS Paint captioning.





Noted literary critic Cat Jensen has proclaimed that Munn is __________ [note: obtain Cat's phone number, call her, convince her not to hang up and get restraining order, get quote about Olivia Munn]

Bravo, Olivia. I am only disappointed I did not have your body of work to study in high school instead of that hack Chaucer. Reading your seminal piece "Begging you to slap my ass so hard I cry..." literally changed my life.